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While
feminists have rallied for female equality in the last century,
men have been left sidelined and floundering, writes Phill Dolby
in a critique of modern masculinity.
I would hardly put Westlife down as notable
social theorists - or indeed talented musicians for that matter.
However, on hearing their dulcet tones float wistfully from
within my sisters room the other day, I was struck- nay, taken
aback- with the [I'm sorry to say it] profundity of their
lyrics. Admittedly what I heard probably wasn't a consciously
written oracle of wisdom. It was more likely a marketable
pop line penned to make teenage girls swoon their way to the
HMV checkout. However, I felt it had a deeper level of symbolism
for us. Perhaps it was a diagnosis of modern times. A cry
from the secular state that is 21st century Britain: 'Tell
me... what makes a man?'
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Okay, I suppose you might appreciate the
sense of irony- a group of 'pretty boys' swaying on their
stools, imploring us to help their love life? Sure they warrant
ridicule.... but in all seriousness, their inquiry in today's
socio-political climate is not so silly and unexpected in
it's literal denotation.
The statistics indicative of male despondency over the last
few years make grievous reading. Out of the 5,986 people who
committed suicide in the UK during 2000, seventy five percent
were male [say The Samaritans]. This is a statistic that's
risen by a terrible seventy two percent between 1970 and 1990,
and is alone reason enough to suggest a specifically gender-related
problem. But there's more. A survey entitled 'Well Being in
Britain and the US' conducted by the University of Warwick
recently found some fourteen per. cent of men were 'not at
all' or 'not very happy' with their life. Meanwhile, male
educational attainment is steadily deteriorating and according
to Psychology Today eating disorders and self-image-related
problems amongst men have more than tripled in the last thirty
years. On top of this sorry list we can now add that at career
entry level men are more under qualified than women and that
in serious diseases like angina, men actually out number women
more than two to one [American Medical Association survey,
1990]. Indeed, men are not as powerful and successful as we
are led to think.
It is interesting to note that this loss of male confidence,
health and self-identity is analogous to a consistent distortion
of what it means to be male in the media. By way of illustration,
to look at changing gender codes in advertising imagery during
the twentieth century is to notice how remarkably 'man' has
transmogrified in the popular mind. From a depiction of the
'idealized' male as chauvinistic, domineering and autocratic
in the 1950s [see fig.ii] we see him leap full-circle- so
that by the 1990s [see fig. iii] he is a polar-opposite, personifying
subordination, stupidity and physical powerlessness. These,
coincidentally, are characteristics that are all given currency
by feminist Gemaine Greer. 'To be male,' she writes in her
book The Whole Woman, 'is to be a kind of idiot savant...
doomed to competition and injustice, not merely towards females
but towards children, animals and other men.'
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Of course adverts like these base their
texts more upon potential laughs than Greer's subversive politics.
[Just think Mr Muscle, Archers and Nissan]. However, as the
saying goes, 'there's many a truth told in jest'. And as antithical
typologies - in complete contrast to one another - these advertisements
speak not only of an insecure and changing male self-image,
but, most importantly, of a masculine-feminine power struggle
rather than mutual respect, co-operation and equality.
It was perhaps somewhere during the flagrant Girl Power movement
of the mid-late '90s that the noble goal of gender balance
was finally rejected; a movement in which female happiness
was seen as mutually exclusive to male happiness, and in which
male derogation was visibly encouraged. 'Opposed to man power'
is the up-to-date definition of Girl Power given by the Oxford
English Dictionary. Moreover, the 1970s foreshadow of the
Spice Girl - 'Riot Grrl' - speaks even more clearly of a real
coup d'etat on male identity, as well as their jobs... [Riot]
Grrl n: 'a young woman perceived as strong or aggressive,
especially in her attitude to men or in her expression of
feminine independence and sexuality.'
The most obvious male reaction to this phenomenon has been,
of course, the emergence of the equally repellent ladish sub-culture,
as purported by commercial men's lifestyle magazines. Instead
of males giving way to their up-and-coming counterparts, many
have knowingly or unknowingly enslaved themselves to mistaken
gender archetypes. They have sought to defend the status quo,
or at the very least cope with change by fostering some form
of contrived 'bloke solidarity' against the threat. Loutishness,
sexual promiscuity, materialism- they're now the norm. Success
for the young man today is not measured so much in terms of
healthy relationships, family life, and a rewarding career
but by whether or not he can 'pull fit birds', drink ten pints
or get the latest pair of Nike running shoes.
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Sadly, this kind of macho escapism does little but compound
existing grievances. Holly Wagner- relationship expert and
international Christian conference speaker- says that 'Men
become what they were created to be when they feel respected'.
So if this is true, the reality is, while males ape around
- toying with such unhealthy vices - they simply do not command
the genuine respect from women, peers and themselves that
they seek. Their devotion to compensatory commodities and
out-dated conventions might provide them with some immediate
gratification, but, long term, they are deprived of any substantive
satisfaction.
So why is it that men seems to be flagging and struggling
so in this new millennium? Why do they look to all the wrong
places for meaning and fulfillment? Well, to answer that we
could continue to argue sociologically. But perhaps it's more
helpful to us if we refer to the Bible for an explanation.
And it is herein that we discover Man is not only intrinsic
to God's celestial plans, but he is also of considerable interest
to the Devil, too. For from his dark perspective, males are
- to adopt a military analogy - targets of high strike potential.
That is, if they can be persuaded to sell out or even just
ignore their divinely ordained purpose, the vital work that
God intends to establish through them may be aborted, stopped
or made simply impracticable. This possibility is true, obviously,
in relation to any aspect of God's Kingdom. However, I believe
that the Devil particularly seeks to steal, kill and destroy
the Creator's purpose for men. Why? Because he knows the blessing,
prosperity and peace that would result through them functioning
properly, in the special way they were designed. I put it
to you that the problems we see befalling males today are
merely symptoms of this invisible, strategic spiritual assault.
From Noah's encounter with drunkenness to King David's adultery,
the Bible is packed full with examples. So what is the exact
role that's so avidly contested?
The scriptures teach very specific things about what men should
be like. Naturally, both men and women are of equal worth
to God, and they should submit one to another in love. However,
the male function is nevertheless very different from the
female, as the female role is very different from the male.
Firstly, the New Testament makes it clear that men are to
serve as the spiritual heads of their households [where there
are, of course, the ideal two parents]. In 1 Corinthians 11,
Paul writes explicitly that he wants us to know that: 'The
head of every man is Christ and the head of every woman is
man, and the head of Christ is God'. [1 Corinthians 11:3].
And this headship - when studied more closely - effectively
involves leading in prayer, encouragement and prophetic direction.
Secondly, the man is crucial to family dynamics.
The Greek word that is repeatedly used for 'family' itself
is patria. It's a word that's derived from pater meaning 'father'.
So, in other words, when Paul says that he bows the knee to
'the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ from whom the whole family
in heaven and earth is named', he is perhaps saying: 'I bow
the knee to the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ from whom
every fatherhood in heaven and earth is named.' [Ephesians
3:14-15.] It can be inferred from this, then, that families
are to a degree extensions of their father. This truth is
reinforced - moreover - in how men are precisely identified
in Ephesians as the ones who have specific influence in raising
their children in the way that they should go. 'And you fathers,'
writes Paul, 'Do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring
them up in the training and admonition of the Lord'. [Ephesians
6:4] An interesting perspective.
Taking these things into account, then,
we can begin to understand maybe why there's increasing trouble
surrounding contemporary men. If the Devil can interfere in
God's role for them and stop them working, loving and leading
as they should, families will be- to varying degrees - vulnerable,
fragile or incarcerated in a life of emotional deprivation.
In the words of the eminent UK Bible teacher Derek Prince,
a family without the man functioning in his rightful place
'is left unprotected spiritually. It is like a ship on a stormy
sea with no captain on the bridge.'
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Of course it is understandable why so many
women feel unable today to allow men to take their place-
for Biblical male qualities have so rarely been personified.
Nevertheless, we should give God's way a go. Let's stop this
silly oscillation between New Man and Machismo Man. Let's
get Man back to basics; back to the Bible where he is encapsulated
as strong while sensitive; thoroughly industrious yet family-orientated,
and ultimately a mirror image of God himself: a benevolent
leader who works for the good of those who love him. With
great husbands and fathers who are committed to empowering,
working alongside, and releasing their wives and children
unto their destinies- as Christ does the church, there'd be
no need for feminism nor, of course, Westlife's nonsensical
pleas for self-help. May the all-encompassing masculinity
of the Bible become the masculinity of our time.
Phill Dolby is a freelance writer and a member
of Abundant Life Church, Bradford.
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